Changes

Friday was my last day at my old job. Tomorrow is the first day of my new job as Emergency Dispatcher/Clerk I for the Scotts Valley Police Department. I have such a mix of feelings about all of it. Mostly good, starting this job has been a 7 month process, filled with a pretty significant moment of dissapoinment along the way. But mostly it is all good, excited feelings! I am excited for all the new things I will learn, I am so excited for the challenge (I have really been suffering for lack of one lately), I am excited to be a part of something bigger than me, I am excited to have new coworkers that will present entirely new situations (I am sure this one might get old fast, but hopefully not!), I am excited to prove myself - that I am the one that they should have hired first, and that I am the right choice now, I am excited to settle into a job and stay there for a long time getting better at it, and improving myself as I go. I am excited for the changes it will make in my life, and I won't pretend, I am excited about the steady paycheck. :)

But I am also nervous of course, I don't want to fail at this. Each time I have been there in the office, or interacted with my new future coworkers, or told others about this job, I have felt a weird sort of thing, like this is just a good fit. That I will fit the job and it will fit me. I have had others tell me the same thing; so there is the fear of being wrong about that, and dissapointing all of those who believe in me in this job. Even with this little bit of anxiety, honestly, this isn't much of my current state of mind, but it is a niggling thing in the back of my mind, but even with this, I know that this last 7 months of trying to get this job has been guided very much by God. His hand has been in it, even when I didn't get it originally. When I found out I had said, "well the perfect scenario would be that I get a call at the end of the summer, after Mexico, after everything else" and weird how that actually happened! By weird, I of course mean, how Divine. So because I know that there was Divinity involved, there isn't much I need to fear. And there is much for me to be excited about.

Now I just need to figure out how to memorize every street in Scotts Valley...oh yeah, and I need to figure out how to get up so much earlier every day and go from a 4 hour work day to an 8-12 hour work day!!! :)